The Wink is a labor of love, occasional source of ire and constantly influenced by the toddlywinks in my life- my daughters. There's also the HunkyWink. You'll read all about them as The Wink unfolds. Please feel free to wink back!

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

So a pregnant chick sits down at a table with 3 engineers...




What happens you ask?

Absolutely nothing.

No offense to any engineer readers I might have, as soon as my belly and I sat down it was like the air over the table froze. Small talk sputtered at best.



"Butter?" I offered.



"No thanks, don't use it," answered engineer number 1, who was a dead ringer for Scotty from Star Trek



"You don't use butter, really?" queried engineer number 2.

"No," answered Scotty, never looking up from his dry roll.



Quiet chewing of dry dinner roll ensued.

"I'm from Canada," offered engineer number 2 completely out of the blue.



"You don't say," the third engineer lobbed back completely by reflex.

Sipping and chewing.

"I'm from Vermont," said Scotty proudly."A lot to do there."



Silence.

"There is a lot to do in Vegas, too," randomly threw out the 3rd engineer.



Seizing an opportunity to sustain a conversation volley I said, "Oh, are you from Vegas?"

"No."

More chewing.

They looked at me and, based on their complete inability to address me or even look at me I figured they saw this:



this:



or this:



I did what anyone would do in the situation, I lost myself in my ice water



and gave a solemn vow



to never do another malicious thing if someone could just put us out of our misery. The end.


Labels:

17 Comments:

Blogger AJ said...

Hilarious! I've been using "story-with-pictures" format in my blog sometimes recently and it's fun. Sometimes the Picture=1000 Words thing is so true. (epecially in the case of those mating mice!)

February 15, 2008 10:20:00 AM PST

 
Blogger flutter said...

ok, a solemn vow almost made me lose control of my bladder.

maybe you could have talked about that...?

February 15, 2008 10:38:00 AM PST

 
Blogger liv said...

engineers? did they smell of dork or geek or dweeb? i have to know.

February 15, 2008 10:40:00 AM PST

 
Blogger Janet said...

Sounds like the perfect Valentine's Day.

Orrrr, the total opposite.

I used to work in high tech marketing. I recall a few user conferences, sitting in the big dining hall trying to make small talk with our customers over breakfast or lunch. Many times I considered driving my fork into the back of my hand just so I could excuse myself and go find a bandaid.

They are a chatty, chatty bunch.

February 15, 2008 10:59:00 AM PST

 
Blogger Beck said...

So you had a good time, then?

February 15, 2008 1:49:00 PM PST

 
Anonymous Clayjack said...

I'm not sure why that felt unusually awkward. All conversations with/among engineers go about the same.

Here's an engineer joke:

A priest, a surgeon and an engineer are out golfing. During their round they encounter another golfer who asks "Would you mind waiting a second before you play your next shots? I'm blind, and it seems I hit a bad slice into your fairway - I just want to put it back into play."

The priest says "Why bless you son. Of course you can play through our fairway." The surgeon says "I hear they're doing fantastic things with cornea transplants. I know an excellent eye surgeon if you ever consider that."

The engineer says "Why don't they play at night?"

February 15, 2008 2:50:00 PM PST

 
Blogger Mrs. Chicken said...

ha! next time just talk about your fundus the whole time and REALLY freak them out.

February 15, 2008 3:21:00 PM PST

 
Blogger Magpie said...

So, um, just what was the malicious thing you did do?

February 15, 2008 4:18:00 PM PST

 
Anonymous pgoodness said...

Love the story with pictures! LOL

February 15, 2008 7:17:00 PM PST

 
Blogger BetteJo said...

I love the belly. Love love the belly. I remember what that belly feels like. Heaven.

I LOVED being pregnant. Sweet pic. :)

February 15, 2008 8:45:00 PM PST

 
Blogger Chaotic Joy said...

Oh this was so funny Amanda. Great job!

February 15, 2008 8:53:00 PM PST

 
Blogger Amy Y said...

At least you weren't at a table with a bunch of computer programmers.

Did your vow work? :)

February 15, 2008 8:54:00 PM PST

 
Anonymous Ree said...

Oh, honey. Tooooo funny.

Having been married to an engineer? I think the rat picture says it all.

February 16, 2008 4:51:00 PM PST

 
Blogger karla said...

Oh to have but a finger nail's width of your wit and sense of humour Amanda! And also your cleverness! I apologize for the leaving this part in a comment, but I can't seem to locate your email address. Do tell me more - because I am rather challenged when it comes to sewing. Do you mean carefully stitch the neckline together a bit at the V point?

February 18, 2008 3:30:00 PM PST

 
Blogger IzzyMom said...

OMG...too funny! Thanks for the laugh.

February 19, 2008 9:48:00 PM PST

 
Blogger Petunia Face said...

I just stumbled onto your blog and am so glad I did--I love it! Happy Friday to me (um, and you, too)!

February 22, 2008 7:30:00 PM PST

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow, that sounds very random and boring, yet interesting and factual. i like it!

December 14, 2008 12:15:00 AM PST

 

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