Just like her mama, messing up sayings and mixing up white knuckling and nail biter as we embarked on our first flight.

Boarding passengers shrank from the sight of us…suckers, she was more agreeable than any adult flying the unfriendly skies.

Without exception, no less than 1/3 of every airport purchased meals is unworthy of ingestion.

Air travel can suck, fixing stuff at the airport can suck way harder.

I knew San Francisco was going to be cool, but I had no idea the airport bathroom stalls would look like a Studio 54 flashback.

Lost car seats, canceled and missed flights, late bags and general rudeness – Thanks, Southwest.

BART had a narcotic effect on Fin.

The streets of San Francisco (How could I post without getting in some Karl and Michael lovin’?) had me rubbernecking.

I will cop to a bit of vanity in that I am generally loathe to post unflattering shots of myself, but good god, we look like we both had collagen injections on our lips by a back alley plastic surgeon…wtf?!

I am so small town, this picture was taken solely because the shoes were $600. If that’s your ass, I am sorry, wasn’t trying to shoot it.

We got all dolled up for the last night of BlogHer–see the necklace that less than 24 hours would be stolen from a plastic security bowl. (Deb, I am just devastated, please know I loved it for every second that I had this incredible new-mama gift you gave me!)

It was neither sidekick nor alcohol that made me think as I rode the Macy’s escalator, “Is that really how the face of a mannequin meant to represent a young girl should look? Really?”

My missed flight brethren.

Pedi, despite not being girlie, after four solid days of exposed heels and toes, it needs to become a part of my routine, if not necessarily my lexicon.

I shared a wild night I barely remember in Baltimore with…Fin.

As I left the Baltimore airport scant hours after having arrived, I stopped at a non-goddessy espresso bar.

“Could I have a skim iced latte?”

If that’s skim milk I’ll eat my hat.

Luckily I found the goddess shortly thereafter and got my fix on, despite it being an “airport Starbucks.”

I’d be lying if I didn’t say that, yes, I really considered it. See ’em? They’re tic tacs. I had no toothbrush people, I was sporting chenille on my front teeth.

Made it home. Everything looked this blurry thanks to so many days in contacts.

The girls were so happy to have their lil sis home they insisted on sitting just so with her.

And apperently I aged like ten years in the time I was gone.

Did they bathe at all while I was gone??*

You made it to the bottom of this? Way to hang in there. I was gone for five days. It was good, I met great people that I failed to take pictures of, I cemented friendships, trembled too much to introduce myself to some, yet I spread my wings and really had a magical time. But coming home? There are not words to describe how fiercely I love this little family I have created.

*Sean not only bathed the girls, he took them to the farmer’s market,
an aquarium, a 3rd birthday with a bounce house and more. You are an incredible husband and dad, babe. I love you.