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Magic from bits

Posted on October 29, 2010

Once upon a time I made a Halloween costume for Briar. I do not know how to sew, I cannot read a pattern, I don’t even flirt with trying a Martha Stewart project. Yet some part of me felt like I needed, at least once, to make a costume by my own hand. There were pinpricks and muttered profanities, supportive suggestions that maybe it was unnecessary from Sean and then, it was done. It was fanciful and twinkly with pastels and jewel tones, cotton and tulle. Looking back I realize it was very much like Briar. We joke that she is girlie and 100% Disney princess obsessed, but that is selling her short. She is, in my opinion, everything a princess should be—nurturer, ham,…

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Imperfection

Posted on October 22, 2010

I have a pretty bad memory, so I don’t remember the exact date, but it was at least by 1991 that I began lamenting how not perfect I was. I’d flirted with it in high school, but frankly track practice and pop rocks kept me from worrying too too much about anything but the moment at hand. It wasn’t until the structure of high school fell away that the full force of self-loathing came into play. Being a sensible young woman I added an older, vastly more experienced in the art of mind-games guy to the equation and voila, I was nowhere near good enough. Fast forward through a bunch of tedious abuse and heartache to 2000. Sean had been trying to crack away…

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Categories: Me

No Fault of Their Own

Posted on October 18, 2010

Since getting married and having kids I’ve been on a path of pursuing the ultimate level of preparedness. I want to have the power bar to slap in Sean’s hands as he starts to grouse, the drinks in hand before the girls mew from the back seat about being thirsty, the gum soother, bum cooler, and toys to fend off squabbles. Each time we leave the house I try to anticipate what might cross my path and, for the most part, I am getting really damned good at it. Every once in a while something happens that makes me think on my feet, but between twinkly smiles, goofy cajoling and glovebox-candy-bribing, I usually eke by. Until others. Others are the element within the equation…

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Categories: Me

Mighty Life List

Posted on October 15, 2010

Been flirting with a Mighty Life List for a couple of months. Last night (3/26/10) I picked it up again. And then again today. Overcome fear of public speaking Visit Montreal Learn to make a fire without matches Experience a full day at the spa Take a weekend-long trip with Sean sans kids Write a book Take voice lessons Learn how to hard boil an egg Take the girls to a Broadway Show Be a landlord, return December and then January’s rent to the tenants Live off the grid for 1 week Overcome my fear of ordering lunch meat at the deli Get back to Spain Eliminate the 24 hourness of of work Take a cross country train trip as a family Add a…

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Categories: Me