I think we all have them, these little guilty pleasures.
Maybe it’s sneaking into the kitchen to get a “glass of water” and popping 2 or 3 (6.5)peanut butter granola cookies in your mouth, washing them down with milk from the jug and then walking out of the kitchen performing a swipe of the mouth reminiscent of a cat after a can of tuna.
Maybe it’s sleeping late on Saturdays.
Not washing your hands after going to the bathroom. (Shame on you! I don’t careif you didn’t pee on your hands!)
Watching soap operas.
We’re getting perilously close to my guilty pleasures.
I love coffee. I love it like some people love beer. I drink it every morning with a ferocity of passion you just can’t know. I stand in front of the coffee pot to drink the first cup and I swear to you I lean down into the counter as I hungrily gulp the hot sweet liquid so that I can add Coffee-Mate for the second cup that much faster. It’s sick. I have a problem. But I am so obviosly stalling here.
It’s embarassing. None of you are going to follow my admission with secrets of your own. You’ll just read and loftily scoff:
“Leans over in front of the pot. Ha. And CoffeeMate, how can she call that coffee?
You lucky lurkers, you!
Ok. Here it is – I love certain celebrity gossip. Not really traditional celebrity gossip. I love celebrity pregnancies. I started with a site called Celebrity Babies but then I discovered Celebrity Moms. I am not interested in seeing photos of mothers desperately shielding their children. I want to see the glowing, jubilant faces of pregnancy.
It’s so tacky, right? So voyeuristic. But let’s put it in perspective. (Sure, rationalize the addiction.)
I am a mom of two, a toddler and an infant. I worship all things pregnancy, parenting and baby related. I believe in the beauty of pregnancy and society’s (Ok, some of society’s) willingness to embrace this time and allow women to revel in the changes in their body. Pregnancy is nothing short of miraculous.So what I get with the Celebrity Mom site is images of people who are experiencing this incredible, awesome- in the truest sense of the word- time in their lives. They are happy and glowing.
I get cool ideas on pregnant mama secrets , funky, hip baby accessories, Daddy treats actually Dads are left out in the cold. Not a lot of cool stuff for them, just like with weddings, 100% focus on the women. Quick trip to EMS for a “diaper day pack” and we can treat good old dad!
Anyway, back to my guilty pleasures. In addition to the whole celebrity baby gawking thing…
for the record, I have the same incorrigible fascination in public. I am the sappy chick across the aisle at the grocery store smiling at you with starry eyes as you mull over whether to buy Cherry Garcia or Oreos. I’m sorry, I just get like a little girl who thinks she’s spotted a unicorn.
My other one is a totally dated stereotype that I am so ashamed of that I pathetically try to hide it from my husband. We both know he knows, but it’s embarrassing. I will watch any, and I mean any home improvement, home makeover, home renovation show. And I’ll take it one step further and you can replace “home” with “person” and I’ll watch that too! Teach me how to transform my bathroom, teacher, cousin, or backyard. Show me why pleats are bad on people with hips and paunches. Illuminate for me why I should consider tiki torches. I get chills just thinking about it. So many possibilities,so many houses, looks, co-workers that are so much worse than mine.
But god, I don’t ever want to have someone say, “So what’d you do Saturday night?”
“Oh, you know, watched 2 hours of Design on a Dime , 2 hours of What Not to Wear , couple episodes of This Old House and something called, “When tragedy meets the surgery table Dr. Divine can help.”
So when I’m watching and I hear someone coming I quickly click to C-Span or ESPN.
“Yup, just checkin’ up on thing in the Senate…or that Bass Fishing Tournament I’ve been so looking forward to.”
One person’s Mallomars are another’s…hell, I don’t know.