Yes, I know, your kid is the most beautiful kid in the world. I totally believe you. Unfortunately, I am going to have to ruin that for you* and introduce you to my daughter. No offense to your kid or anything, but come on, look at this child. She makes unicorns and angels jealous. You doubt me? Just look, she’s pulling off white denim, both with the Care Bear Dr. Zhivago hat and without. She is simply too precious to bear.

*Don’t take life too seriously. They’re all beautiful. I’m just being a dork. Your child is gorgeous.