Excuse me, have we met before?

I’m not sure. You do look kind of familiar.

Hmm, my name is Nerve. Last Nerve.

Oh. I believe we have met. My name is Barnaby. You are, what I like to call, my dance floor.

Really? Any chance you could cut me some slack. I’m only one nerve and I am wearing ever so thin.


Really, if you could just lay off with the cha cha cha’ing through every door in the house.


Maybe ease back to 23 in and outs between the hours of 3 and 7? Just for a little while?


It’s cold and even though you howl to go out, once out you wait long enough for me to get to the next room and whine to come in.


When I come back to let you in you look at me, stretch and walk away.


Then I close the window or the door and you dart in and hiss at me if the window so much as grazes your tail.

Well, quit closing it so fast.

But I wait for minutes, the girls get cold. Maybe could devise a schedule.

We could, but I don’t really give a flying fuck, so no thanks. I’m a cat. Deal.