Today is Mother’s Day. I was searching for a way to encapsulate what that means, striking just the right chord to make people exclaim, “Oh that! Yes, that is it! Me too!” It’s funny, whenever you try to do something perfect you are almost certain to fail. Sure enough the keys stared back at me, “Well, you gonna type something?” they seemed to mock. The girls didn’t nap. The coffee didn’t satisfy. And the words, oh how the words wouldn’t come.
I guess it really boils down to this— I think Mother’s Day is bogus. Don’t get me wrong, I think there are a lot of things I do that deserve recognition, but they don’t have a whole lot to do with mothering, maintaining maybe. Thank me for the laundry, yes. For remembering the ticky-tack little shit details like which day Briar has to bring snack or which day Sean won’t have time to sneak out for lunch. Be amazed that I can find an undershirt, the Crystal Light and a last-minute-perfect-for-the-occasion-gift. Sure, that’d be great, but recognition for loving? No, thanks.
I am an unapologetic momaddict. I can gush for hours on breastfeeding, middle of the night babbling or shape spotting in clouds. I am absolutely certain that the person I am today is better than the person I was before having kids. I stand behind the decisions I make, the life that I am leading and the way in which I prioritize. The things is that’s all just instinct, hard coding within the mom that I am.
This “special day” meant to honor that feels very strange. I like making breakfast. I take a sick delight in the chaos and weight of it all. It’s why we went on a hike last year, the injuries from Finley’s birth still raw and unhealed. I wanted to be doing, loving, experiencing.
The girls are upstairs right now, the writing on the wall is clear— there will be NO nap. Sean is out mowing the lawn. Instead of music the loud roar of the lawnmower, the thunderous clomping of Avery’s attempts to tiptoe and the non-stop banter between Briar and Fin are my playlist.
I am a mom and exactly who I was meant to be. Every day. I suppose the only thing really different about today is how heightened my awareness of other moms is and for that I am quite thankful. I think the things we are doing every day, whether it involves an office outside of the home, a gaggle of kids inside the home or any variation on that theme in between, are amazing. Maybe thinking about it as a day for all the mothers to be recognized as one incredible part of society than I kind of dig that.
Today for those that are moms, are about-to-be-moms, trying-to-become-moms or remembering-moms-that-are-gone, I wish you a happy day.