I am a believer in meant to be things. I don’t mean that I just let life happen to me, but when a person comes into my life when I need them, it’s meant to be. When I work really hard at something and despite my best efforts it doesn’t click, I trust that it wasn’t meant to be at that time. When my friend Galit Breen reached out to me a few weeks ago I felt the tickle of what might be meant to be.
Galit invited me to try out Master Classes from VProudTV; a series of videos from experts to help us avoid “Dr. Google”. I winced; I’m not into webinars or online classes.
I didn’t say no, one of the things I’ve learned over the last couple of years is that it’s ok to pause before making a decision. I trust and respect Galit. Scanning the VProudTV site I was impressed by the quality and the idea that it is “troll free” was incredibly refreshing.
One of the classes was titled, “Parenting Through Puberty. I sat up a little bit, shocked by my own eagerness. Puberty has been knocking on our door for a few years. “Let me take a look,” I said.
The video is made up of several 8-10 minutes chapters presented by Dr. Cara Natterson*. It felt completely natural, like I was at a coffee shop with her, well, you know, except I wasn’t worried people were going to eavesdrop on details of pubic hair and body odor. I actually wore ear buds and had the video running behind other windows on my laptop while I worked on a project at my office.
Puberty is more than one talk or one milestone; it’s an ongoing experience that we all have. It can start as early as 8 or 9, which is about how old I am here.
Why do we fear it?
What makes us cringe and approach it like it’s going to be a nightmare?
The points in this video were so sensible, but I think in the way that puberty gets us all a little off balance as we live it, trying to parent through it makes us forget stuff. I could have spaced the chapters out over a few days, but my appetite was such that I consumed it in one sitting.
When my girls were little I monitored their sleep and diet, I listened to them and taught them on a daily basis and most importantly, I approached each developmental stage with compassion. There shouldn’t be shame in puberty, the living of it or the parenting.
At one point Dr. Natterson said, “You will be asked, maybe start thinking about it now.” I no longer feel like I have to tiptoe. I honestly feel like I can walk hand in hand with my daughters through all the turbulence and wonder of puberty. I’ll be watching or listening to more of these, no doubt. I’ll also be working with VProudTV to make sure more people know about these classes. We tell our kids that knowledge is important and we know it to be true ourselves, but I think a lot of us stumble. If you want to try a class, there are many (diet, fertility, behavior, sexual dysfunction), here is a link.
I wrote a post for VProudTV about puberty, which is right here. Will you go over and read it?
*Dr. Cara Natterson wrote the Care and Keeping of You Books that we love and that I recommend every chance that I get.