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Pressing Moments

Posted on October 9, 2012

Days pass, the hours and minutes diabolically fluid, unconcerned by things like consistency. They sometimes stretch impossibly, then other times disappear without warning. I tell myself I should buy sparklers but when I look up, I’m late for jack-o-lanterns. We talked about Disney World, but they were too young, now we are in a sprint to beat the imminent disdain for princesses. I used to chase the traditions I thought we were supposed to have, but I’ve come to understand that they aren’t for us. Our special, our “we always used to…” is in projects and road trips, not centerpieces. Driving north the girls will exclaim, “Hey, we swam there. Remember mom?” I’ll listen as they tango with the details, “I was four and you…

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Life’s Curves

Posted on October 3, 2012

This morning the phone rang with news that a colleague, friend and mentor died unexpectedly. This person was someone who was loosely threaded through so many different chapters of our time in Glens Falls and Queensbury. He walked me through my first press check. He wore a velvet robe and laurel wreath as Father Christmas during the holidays and read Robert Frost to our girls. He brought soups and sauces he made into our first office and then our second office. He sent me messages of wisdom about never letting go of your dreams—he said very plainly, “Don’t ever grow up. Just don’t.” He kept us honest at work, encouraging us, chiding us and ribbing us in the way only a person who truly…

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Meaning It

Posted on September 23, 2012

When I was in high school I had three very close friends. We would link arms in the hallway, while away hours outside of school playing Marco Polo and wondering wistfully about boys we had crushes on—it was a very sweet, simple time. Before things became marred by attacks, irrational boyfriends and the inevitable growing apart that happens in those emotion fraught years, there was very little that disturbed our union. Looking back, I see four girls who found comfort in one another, confiding about struggles with siblings or parents, building each other up with the ability to see one another’s strengths. I also see a younger version of myself who was quick to feel slighted and had a tendency toward not believing she…

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Unofficially Awkward

Posted on September 16, 2012

For as long as I can remember, trying to look sexy is something that I cannot do. Not that I’ve been trying to do it for that long, but I guess I always thought I’d get to an age/place/stage that would mark the time at which I was no longer so calamitously awkward. Last week Sean and I headed up to the lake for date night. It was spectacular—with no one on the lake, just enough sun to be gorgeous and just enough wind to cool. Sean was taking us out to putter in Northwest Bay and I was devouring the quiet. Everywhere I looked was more golden sparkle of sunshine on water and sparks of crimson in stands of tress. I gabbed my…

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Stillness

Posted on September 10, 2012

Parenting reveals how often you move or, more specifically how often you didn’t move before. Your understanding of motion and stillness is forever altered. You bring your baby home and there is constant motion—scurrying for burp cloths, clanging about for gum gel, scrambling for a wipe. Then they are toddlers and your jerky movements are to swipe the lit candle from their reach, moving the cushion to break their fall, and swooping in to grab them before they actually kiss the back end of the strange dog. By the time grade school comes they are getting so fast that your movements are sometimes to keep up and other times it’s to hide the emotion when they say, “I’ve got it. I don’t need you,…

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