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Shifting Focus

Posted on November 7, 2017

This fall has carried with it an unprecedented level of busyness. I used to sit in the camp of busy being good, but several years ago I saw the light. No one cares, there are no awards, you don’t get out of bad luck or health calamities because you were working hard. Life happens whether we carve time for it or push it off until “things ease up a bit.” Sunday was the final day of the girls’ and Sean’s run of Oliver. It was a whirlwind that came to a close on the doorstep of exhaustion. Any longer and it would have been too much, any shorter and it wouldn’t have been the experience that it was. Monday morning Sean and I trained…

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Taking Turns Benefits Everyone

Posted on November 5, 2017

A couple of days after bringing Briar home from the hospital my mom set a turkey sandwich on the arm of the chair I was in, “Be sure to save a little for Sean.” She said nothing more. She wasn’t talking about the sandwich, it was about my complete infatuation with Briar. If I wasn’t nursing her I was gazing into her eyes and kissing her brow. I was in complete awe of this new creature and I gave her everything. My mom was reminding me that it was my marriage and this man that had made her possible. “Save a little for Sean,” could also mean, “Save a little for yourself.”Spend time on who or what brings you joy. Put your own air…

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“Mom, please?”

Posted on November 3, 2017

The times that I close may laptop or the laundry room door almost always result in something I would have kept putting off until the requests faded to nothing. A couple of weeks ago Sean decided to take us all on a bike ride. Originally it was going to be a quick loop around the neighborhood, but he suggested the bike trail. It was, as I am sure some people reading this are already surmising, an ordeal. Flat tires. Missing bike helmets. Modest interest. Broken water bottle holders. Somehow we made it. Briar stayed home and I borrowed her bike. Avery and Finley were tired about 1 mile into a 7 mile ride. Scattered leaves and pine needles made for a treacherous course, and…

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I Want To Remember This

Posted on November 2, 2017

The girls and Sean are in a production of Oliver, which opens tomorrow night. I have been in intermittent attendance, lending a hand for load-in and construction, ferrying dinner and forgotten things to rehearsal, and finally tonight to help out with make-up and quick changes. It’s strange to be there, feeling at times like a pronounced outlier but also like I am home—only the home is old memories, different faces. A different theatre and another time. I try to fade to the edges. Briar walked me through what she needed and explained to me what she’d be ok not having enough time to manage. I smiled and quietly nodded as I hooked her cap in my back pocket, set her dress shirt on my…

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